The Unseen Fortress: Setting Personal Boundaries at Work
Mastering the art of balance: strategies to define, maintain, and defend your personal boundaries in the workplace.
Boundaries — not a word often associated with positive workplace dynamics, is it? They're frequently viewed as barriers, impediments to collaboration, and more. Yet, my journey has taught me that personal boundaries are not hindrances but catalysts for growth, balance, and productivity. Drawing from hard-won personal experience, here are some of my insights, strategies, and actions.
The first step is to understand what personal boundaries are. They are essentially invisible lines we draw to protect our wellbeing and maintain our individuality. Think of them as the walls of an unseen fortress that keep your world secure and harmonious.
Why is this fortress vital? As humans, we thrive on connection, but we also need autonomy. Personal boundaries safeguard our individuality and self-worth. They're vital to maintaining our mental, physical, and emotional wellbeing. Plus, they create a framework for understanding and respecting others’ limits as well.
The benefits are many. They help prevent burnout and stress, preserve our work-life balance, ensure healthier interactions with colleagues, and boost overall productivity. They even lend a sense of identity that is distinct from our professional persona.
A few years ago, I was working as a strategist at a digital marketing agency. The vibrancy of agency life often spilled over the edges of the typical 9-to-5 workday, blurring the lines between professional obligations and personal time. We chatted about work over text late into the night and even on weekends. While this may seem like dedication, it wasn’t long before the scales tipped from enjoyable to exhausting.
One such boundary was my time. Working late hours and being expected to respond to messages outside of my regular schedule had become the norm. This overstepped the boundary of my personal time and began to infringe on my wellbeing, leading to the negative feeling of overwork and impacting my creativity, a crucial aspect of my role.
Then there were the incessant emotional demands. Colleagues vented about work or personal problems, and I found myself playing the unexpected role of an emotional support system. While empathy is essential in any workplace, the extent of the emotional labour I was shouldering began to feel like a burden.
The open workspace culture and hot-desking, although designed to foster collaboration, often impinged on physical boundaries. Uninvited invasions into my personal space as I worked were common, disrupting my concentration and comfort.
I also noticed myself frequently stepping out of my professional lane as a strategist. I was asked to lead tricky client conversations and even some minor agency public relations crises because I had a knack for it. Despite it being outside of my designated role, I dove in, further blurring my job boundaries.
One significant boundary breach came when I found myself constantly covering for a team member who was frequently absent. My workload surged, with no extra compensation for the additional work, further encroaching on my time and energy.
The feelings of stress, overwhelm, overwork, and burnout — The “Four Horsemen” of work that isn’t working — became too much, and I knew that I had to do something. I had to build my fortress. I had to build my personal boundaries.
Recognising these breaches was the first step. To restore balance, I began by delineating my working hours and sticking to them, creating a clear divide between my work and personal life.
Our job descriptions are important in setting these boundaries. They define what's expected of us — our roles, responsibilities, and working hours. We often tend to go beyond this, driven by ambition or pressure. But here's the thing — continuously overstepping your job description isn't commitment; it's chaos. The limits set by our roles can serve as our first line of defence in protecting our personal boundaries.
I established my emotional and physical boundaries, kindly but firmly expressing them when colleagues overstepped them. For my professional boundaries, I initiated a conversation with my manager about my role, responsibilities, and the need for appropriate resource allocation.
It wasn’t easy, but the transformation was profound. I felt lighter and more focused, and the quality of my work improved significantly. More importantly, my colleagues and superiors started respecting my boundaries, fostering a healthier and more productive work environment. And they too started following suit. Our overall performance improved, and so did our camaraderie. It was a clear testament to the power of personal boundaries.
In retrospect, my experience taught me the vital role of personal boundaries at work. They are not walls that hinder progress, but fortresses that protect our wellbeing and work-life balance.
Practice: Start Creating Your Boundaries Today
Creating personal boundaries may seem challenging, but here are a few tactical steps that worked for me:
🔍 Identify your boundaries: Define your limits concerning time, tasks, and emotional investment.
💬 Communicate clearly: Express your boundaries in a respectful yet firm manner.
⏳ Consistency: Hold your ground consistently, even when it's hard.
🚫 Learn to say 'no': It's difficult but crucial. If something encroaches on your personal time or is beyond your role, be willing to say no.
👥 Lead by example: Respect others' boundaries and encourage a culture of balance in your workplace.
Your personal fortress isn't built overnight. It takes patience, effort, and, most importantly, the realisation that you are as important as your work. Build it brick by brick, respect it, and you will see the fortress not as a barrier but as a bastion of balance and wellbeing.