Awaken the Courage Already Within You: a #WorkKind Principle
Embracing your brave zone: How self-kindness fuels transformation and growth.
Having now worked with over 30 organisations and thousands of people, I’ve seen kindness in action in all sorts of ways. This has led me to develop a set of #WorkKind Principles, the first of which I’m sharing today.
A solid set of principles is the Operating System (OS) for your work and life because they are the foundation upon which your thoughts and behaviours are built in order to live a purposeful, fulfilling, and happy life.
#WorkKind Principles are drawn from ancient wisdom; philosophical, religious, and literary works; success principles; contemporary management thinking; developments in psychology, neuroscience, and organisational psychology; plus insights from the natural world. These principles are the foundation for a life well lived.
Awaken the Courage Already Within You
Courage? It's not something you pick up from a store. It's not even something you borrow from a book or a motivational speaker. No, courage is like a current—a vital force that's already running through you, just waiting to be tapped. It's not about being fearless; it's about leaning into that fear and using it as fuel for your fire.
Dream of making a splash at work or in life? Want to make your mark—to do something unforgettable, something truly positive? Then, my friend, you're going to need courage. The kind that pushes you to do things that are not just outside the box but on a whole different plane.
Here's the beautiful truth: When you've figured out your 'Why'—that driving force that propels you forward—the discovery of your inherent courage isn't just some nice-to-have, it's a must-have. And this isn't something you just happen upon. It's already there, nested in the depths of your spirit, awaiting its grand unveiling. You've got this courage inside you, like a seed, ready and waiting to break through the soil and reach for the sky. So, don't just wait around for courage to fall into your lap—recognise it and embrace it. It's already yours. It always has been.
The “First Lady” of Civil Rights
One person who had the courage time and time again to stand up for what she believed in was the LGBTQI activist Sylvia Rivera (pictured above), a transgender advocate who played a pivotal role in the Stonewall riots of 1969, which marked a turning point in the LGBTQI rights movement. Born in New York City in 1951, Sylvia faced significant challenges and discrimination from an early age due to her gender identity and expression. She was often forced to drop out of school and was unable to secure stable employment due to her identity as a transgender woman. At the time, homosexuality was illegal in most American states, and discrimination against LGBTQI people was widespread.
In 1969, Sylvia was at the Stonewall Inn, a gay bar in New York City that was frequently targeted by police raids. On the night of June 28th, police officers raided the bar and began arresting patrons. Sylvia was one of several people who resisted the police, leading to a series of spontaneous protests and riots that continued for several days.
After the Stonewall riots, Sylvia became increasingly involved in LGBTQI activism and advocacy, co-founding several organisations and working to promote greater visibility and acceptance of transgender and gender nonconforming individuals. However, her activism often put them in conflict with mainstream LGBTQI organisations, which were often dominated by white, middle-class, cisgender gay men.
In addition to her activism, Sylvia also faced significant challenges and discrimination in her personal life. She struggled with poverty, homelessness, and substance abuse and was frequently targeted by police for her gender identity and expression. In 1973, she was arrested and sent to prison for several months on charges related to her participation in a demonstration at the New York City Women's House of Detention, where she and others demanded better treatment and conditions for incarcerated women.
During her time in prison, Sylvia experienced significant hardship and abuse, including being placed in solitary confinement and denied access to medical care. However, she continued to advocate for the rights of transgender and gender nonconforming individuals and, upon release from prison, became increasingly involved in advocacy work around issues such as housing, healthcare, and employment discrimination.
Throughout her life, Sylvia remained a fierce and outspoken advocate for the rights of LGBTQI individuals, particularly transgender and gender nonconforming people. Sylvia refused to be silenced or intimidated by those who sought to marginalise or oppress her, instead using her voice as a platform to demand change. The United States Congress has honoured Sylvia as “the first lady of civil rights” and “the mother of the freedom movement.” Her legacy continues to inspire and empower activists and advocates in the LGBTQI community today as a symbol of the power of courage and perseverance in the face of adversity.
Still I Rise
You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.
In her poem “Still I Rise,” the poet Maya Angelou speaks to the power and resilience of the human spirit in the face of adversity and oppression and celebrates the courage of those who refuse to be broken or defeated by the challenges they face. As she says,
“Courage is the most important of all the virtues because without courage, you can't practice any other virtue consistently.”
Courage, temperance, justice, and wisdom. Equally valued by Christianity, Buddhism, Hinduism, and just about every other philosophy you can imagine, these are the four cardinal virtues. They’re called “cardinal,” as C. S. Lewis pointed out, not because they come down from church authorities but because they originate from Latin, where “cardo” means “hinge” or “pivot,” signifying that these virtues are the central or pivotal qualities upon which good moral character hinges. With courage, we do good work. Work that has meaning and that creates a positive impact in the world. Work which makes us thrive. Without having the courage to work for something greater than ourselves, work is simply a job. To work better is to work with courage. So, let's make sure we have a clear, shared definition of it.
Courage is the ability to face and overcome fear, danger, or difficulty with bravery, determination, and resilience. Courage can take many forms, from standing up for one's beliefs and values in the face of opposition to taking risks and pursuing one's goals in the face of uncertainty or adversity. Courage requires a willingness to face one's fears and challenges head-on. Courage isn’t the absence of fear; it’s carrying on despite it. Courage often involves a sense of purpose or mission that drives an individual to take action, regardless of the risks or obstacles involved.
Courage comes in many forms—physical, emotional, moral, creative, and intellectual—and can be both big and small. We are courageous in small everyday acts of bravery and also when we are kind, compassionate, and empathetic. We are courageous in the bigger things, such as standing up for what we believe in, speaking out against injustice, or facing our fears and challenges with determination and resilience. Doing the right thing almost always takes courage, and so courage is an essential part of the human experience and a vital component of personal growth and development. It’s helpful here to understand the neuroscience of courage.
The brain’s “brave zone”
Fear is a survival mechanism managed by our brain's limbic system, specifically the amygdala, which alerts us to potential threats and helps us react appropriately. When we perceive danger, the amygdala triggers a series of reactions in the body to prepare for a fight-or-flight response.
However, other parts of the brain can help us control and manage this fear response. For example, the prefrontal cortex, the area responsible for higher cognitive functions such as decision-making and planning, can help assess the threat's real magnitude and come up with a reasonable response. This interaction between the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex can be seen as your brain's “brave zone”.
When you're faced with a fear-inducing situation but decide to face it head-on, it's your “brave zone” at work. It involves your prefrontal cortex damping down the response of the amygdala, helping you think clearly and act despite the fear.
Through certain practices like mindfulness, cognitive behavioural therapy, or exposure therapy, one can train their brain to better manage fear. These techniques can help strengthen the prefrontal cortex's control over the amygdala, allowing you to react more courageously in stressful situations. This is often referred to as courage training in neuroscience.
However, it's crucial to understand that being courageous doesn't mean being fearless. Courage is all about acknowledging your fear and choosing to act despite it. That's where the concept of the “brave zone” comes in. It's the mental space where you allow yourself to feel scared yet decide to take action regardless of the fear.
There are two paths we can take
Courage is all around us every day. It's the person speaking up in a meeting because they don't think the direction we're taking is right. It's reaching out to somebody we think may need some support—an act of kindness that is generally well received. Especially when we are empathetic and non-assumptive in our approach, using words such as, “I hope everything's going well with you; I wanted to remind you that I'm here to help if you ever need it. Feel free to reach out anytime, even if it's just for a casual conversation.”
There are two paths we can take. On one path, we say to ourselves that we have agency, that we are in control of our choices and actions and the consequences they have on our lives. Or we can choose a path of helplessness, believing that we are at the mercy of our situation and powerless to do anything about it. Agency requires courage—the courage to choose what's right for us.
Anything better takes courage because anything better is more than the ordinary. We cannot hope to have an extraordinary life by making ordinary decisions. Maybe ordinary is fine. It is for most people because it is, well, ordinary. But I suspect, because you're reading this now, that you are reaching for the extraordinary.
The truth is that we always know which path to take. It's the one we fear the most. The question we must face all the time is, “Am I willing to go through this fear?” Because we cannot avoid fear. But we can choose to acknowledge it and move through it in our actions.
Our courage matters, both to ourselves and to potentially millions of other people. The author and modern Stoic Ryan Holiday has said:
“The belief that an individual can make a difference is the first step. The next is understanding that you can be that person.”
As Sylvia Rivera said:
“I have been beaten. I have had my nose broken. I have been thrown into jail. I have lost my job. I have lost my apartment for gay liberation. I have slept with more people than I care to remember. And no, I am not ashamed. My life has been affected by all of these things. And I consider myself to be a revolutionary.”
Sylvia believed that they could make a difference, and they did as a revolutionary for LGBTQI rights, paying an enormous personal price for her courage.
What are you willing to pay for what you believe in?
“Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch that I have got a hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations,” said the playwright George Bernard Shaw.
“The lives of great men all remind us that we can make our lives sublime and, departing, leave behind us footprints on the sands of time,” the poet Longfellow wrote.
Man, woman, however we identify ourselves, we are all capable of leaving footprints in the sands of time and doing good work for future generations. Will we choose to? Will we choose the path of courage?
Think now of something at work where courage is required.
Now think of the Why you have to do this thing, for it is in your Why that you can unlock your courage.
That presentation you have to make, that conversation that needs to happen?
Bring to life the Why it must be done.
Sylvia pushed through their fear because her Why was powerful enough. The young British, barely trained, fighter pilots who climbed into their planes to defend their country against large-scale attacks by Nazi Germany's air force had a powerful Why — they were the only line of defence in the “Luftschlacht um England”, literally “The Air Battle for England”.
When we have a higher calling or a noble purpose, courage simply becomes less of an issue. We must do what is needed because our Why is so powerful.
Leaving footprints in the sand
In our working lives, there are many situations where we may be required to show courage in its many forms, such as:
Speaking up about workplace harassment or discrimination requires the moral courage to stand up for what is right and just, even in the face of opposition or pushback from colleagues or management.
Making a difficult decision that may have significant consequences for ourselves or others requires the intellectual courage to challenge conventional wisdom, consider alternative viewpoints, and make tough choices based on careful analysis and reflection.
Taking on a new project or challenge that feels intimidating or outside of our comfort zone requires the creative courage to take risks, experiment with new ideas and approaches, and push beyond our limits to achieve new levels of growth and success.
Dealing with a difficult coworker or supervisor requires the emotional courage to manage our emotions, stay calm and composed under pressure, and respond with empathy and understanding even in the face of challenging or unpleasant situations.
To develop courage and push back fear in these situations, there are several strategies we can use:
Practice self-care: Take care of our physical, emotional, and mental well-being through activities like exercise, meditation, therapy, or hobbies that bring us joy and relaxation.
Take small steps: Start with small, manageable steps towards our goals, rather than trying to tackle everything at once. This can help build momentum and confidence over time.
Stay connected to our values: Reflect on our core values and beliefs and use them as a compass to guide our actions and decisions. This can help us stay grounded and focused even in the face of uncertainty or adversity.
Cultivate a growth mindset: Embrace challenges and setbacks as opportunities for growth and learning rather than as threats to our success or identity.
Seek out support: Surround ourselves with people who encourage and support us, and seek out mentors or role models who can offer guidance and inspiration.
Think back to where you need to show courage at work.
That fear you feel now, which may be lessened because you're connected more deeply to your Why, is a sign. It is a sign that you are being called. And what matters is that, at your next opportunity at work, you answer that call.
Remember, if you want to achieve the extraordinary, you must awaken the courage within you to do extraordinary things. Because when you do extraordinary things at work, your life will become much more extraordinary.
And, when you are kind to yourself because you've awakened the courage within you, you will also serve as an example to others to encourage them to be kind to themselves and awaken their courage. When Longfellow wrote about leaving "footprints in the sand," this was the point:
Footprints, that perhaps another
Sailing o'er life's solemn main
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother
Seeing, shall take heart again.
Unlike Sylvia Rivera, it is most likely that—without having your nose broken, being made homeless, or being thrown in jail—you can inspire a brother, a sister, or anyone to be kind to themselves and awaken their courage. To leave their own footprints in the sand for others to see.
So, what are you waiting for?